


Two Dicks

by IneffableSuperNova23 (orphan_account)



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Crack, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), M/M, Mild Smut, Snakes have two dicks???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:35:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23963965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/IneffableSuperNova23
Summary: Snakes have two dicks... so why wouldnt Crowley?Just a small crack fic I thought of when I was sleep deprived.It's pretty short- idk how many words exactly. I'm tired though it's late at night and I cant weite more. Maybe I'll do more in the morning.
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Kudos: 15





	Two Dicks

Crowley and Aziraphale had been through so much together. Some would go as far to say that Crowley had gone to hell and back for Aziraphale, pun very much intended. These chaotic dumbasses were friends for 6000 years and had their ups and downs, as all friendships do. The occasional "we're not friends, I dont even like you!" with a small pout was thrown around sometimes. It wasnt until a week after Armageddidn't that they realized they could be more than friends. They could be lovers, ineffable husbands maybe. Well... husbands after a bit of dating.

One night, the pair got completely drunk out of their minds. They wouldnt stop giggling like children and making out with one another. Truth be told - Aziraphale was the one who would go further than a hand hold or an arm around the other's waist. Aziraphale would make the kiss a little more heated than just a small peck on the lips. He preferred Crowley to know who he belonged to, because yes - aziraphale is a top. 

Crowley however would get overly flustered and would push Aziraphale away if things got too heated. It was unlike a demon to be shy, but Aziraphale chose not to question it. At least... not until tonight.

Aziraphale bit Crowley's lip gently, making the demon let out a tiny moan. "Angel!" His voice sounded like music to Aziraphale. Of course the Angel loved hearing the moans and gasps of the Male beneath him, especially if they were of his name or nickname. Aziraphale laid a few kisses and nips across Crowley's neck and shoulders until Crowley tried to push him off. "Stop, Aziraphale."

Aziraphale, ever the gentleman, listened and got off of Crowley. He never means to go too far and the demon knows it. The angel takes a moment but finally speaks up, "Why do you push me away when you obviously want it so bad?"

Crowley's eyebrows shoot up. He knew that Aziraphale would question him at some point but he didnt think it would be now when they're drunk. He supposed that being drunk while explaining his... situation... would be best anyways. 

"W-Well," he hiccoughed, "I ha-ave a sort of... nnnhhg," he paused to think of the right terminology to use, "situation, angel. I'm a snake."

"Yes, the serpent of Eden. Wiley old serpent. Why is that a problem for this?" Aziraphale questioned. Aziraphale had sobered up a bit ago for this conversation - and he didnt want to be drunk during his first time with Crowley if it led up to that.

"Snakes... they, er... they have two..." He trailed off, hoping the blond would understand what he was getting at. Instead, Aziraphale was confused. 

"Two, what? Hearts?"

"Dicks."

"What?"

"Dicks! Cocks, penises, that!" Crowley snapped, a little embarrassed. He never wanted Aziraphale to find out about it, although he would be lying if he said he didnt want to fuck the angel - or be fucked by him.

Aziraphale gaped for a moment before promptly closing his mouth with a click. "Oh." He couldn't think of anything to say. If he were Crowley, he would definitely be saying the signature "ngk" right now.

"Yeah. That's why I didnt want to tell you. I knew you would think differently-"

"No! Heavens no, Crowley. I dont think different of you at all! Come now, dear boy. We'll go to a more private setting and you can show me what you can do with them."


End file.
